Words are so powerful…we all know that as readers, writers, speakers,
My question this morning is how powerful is the lack of words…
I am always fascinated by people, who say so powerfully,
‘I’m not talking to so and so…’
My curiosity runs me down and takes me over,
Making me wonder exactly what they were trying to accomplish with their silence,
I had never asked anyone what was the intent of that until yesterday…
I was talking to a coworker and we had covered all the changes we had gone through in our agency in the past couple of years,
And how we were looking forward to slowing down a bit in the upcoming fiscal year,
We then started talking about our activities,
Of course we segued to people,
She commented that she wasn’t talking to X,
After all these years of wondering I asked,
“How is your not talking to her supposed to impact her?”
The look of surprise on her face was priceless…
I knew that she had given it some thought but was unable to articulate what she thought the result would be,
Finally, she asked what I meant,
I told her that I had never been able to grasp or understand,
The concept of punishment by not talking…
Because most of us are so busy, that unless the person is in some way so valuable to us,
There is a good chance the person won’t even realize it,
Or they may in fact consider it an un-prayed for blessing…
Her face colored because I knew I had hit the nail on the head,
Somewhere inside her being she had really felt that she would cause some kind of feelings in the person she wasn’t communicating with,
The idea that potentially she wouldn’t had never occurred to her…
She asked me how did I deal when people stopped talking to me…
I told her simply,
That if they were important to me, I asked them, trying to figure out how to resolve it,
Otherwise I didn’t notice it and in the case where I did I chose to embrace the silence…
I went on to tell her that I was currently in a season of silence from a few folks,
She asked me why,
And I told her that because I had to clean up my commitments and what I could take on,
Many had gotten quiet on me and gone completely ghost in some cases,
She asked how did I feel about it,
I told her I was grateful, because it showed me what my value was to those people,
And at this point in my life,
I don’t have a great deal of time to spend in situations that lack value…
She nodded in understanding, telling me I gave her something to think about,
I nodded back…
Love, Peace and Blessings…
Angelia
