Angelia Vernon Menchan

Angelia Vernon Menchan is an author, publisher and public speaker who owns two publishing companies, MAMM Productions and Honorable Menchan Media. Mrs. Menchan is also a Budget Officer and former Job Corps Counselor. To date she has published twenty-three books of her own work, both fiction and non-fiction and more than eighty ebook novellas on You can access her bibliography on search words: Angelia Vernon Menchan

Contact information:
Phone numbers: 904 714 2272 904 303 2679

Friday, July 31, 2009


The other day I was cleaning out my closets,

And I must confess, I was a bit shame...

I had bags and bags and bags of clothes...

Mind you some were old,


I also had lots of shoes,

My church was doing a Soles for Souls drive,

So I was going to donate the shoes,

But still,

It made me realize how blessed I am, but it also made me realize,

How we got in the economic crisis,

We buy way to much $#@&...

I work hard, I pay my tithes, I have investments,

I help those in need and some in want,

But I think of how much more I could do and how much,

I could save if I didnt have so much STUFF...

This morning I was reminded of it again,

I walked outside to water the plants and drop mail in the box,

And looking around my hood (sic)

I noticed that almost every driveway had three cars,

At least two,

The people across the street have three cars and motorcyle,

Only two of 'em,

Now dont think for one minute that I am saying that those of us,

Who work hard should not have what we want,

No No No,

But what I am saying and I am saying it just for me,

I would be just as happy and live just as well,

With a fraction of the stuff I have,

So, dont think for one minute,

That I am going to change all this in a day,

But I am going to try,

To do better,


I need to empty one of these bookshelves in my office,

Clay county jail needs,

Books for Inmates...



Thursday, July 30, 2009


This morning driving in, I was listening to Jennifer Hudson,
I need music, the way plants need water and miracle gro…
And I was thinking, boy am I tired!
It has been a long draining week,
People in my life have needed me like they never needed me before,
And one thing I will always do,
Without fainting is be there for those I value,
And do whatever I can for them,
Mostly all I have is love and fervent prayer,
And good food, every now and then,
But that love and prayer, I will sprinkle that all over them like holy water,
Once I have done all I can do,
And it is a scanty bit, to be sure,
I stand, as Mr. McClurkin says so eloquently,
Because once it is done, it is done,
And it becomes up to the ones you pray for and love,
To handle up from there,
And those of us who are there for the masses,
Are the glue as the Pastor said a couple of weeks ago,
Have to take some down time,
Be a tad bit selfish,
Indulging ourselves a bit,
So today I am work,
But I am going to work at a smooth pace,
Because God has granted me that by putting me in a good place,
And tomorrow,
I plan to hunker down at home,
Watch a few movies,
Maybe read a bit,
Stay in my jammies all day,
Have a bit of vino, maybe,
And get restored,
Because there will come a time,
And it won’t be long,
When I will be called to deploy,
With love and prayer in hand,
And off I will go…
Through grace,
It is what I do,
And who I be….


Wednesday, July 29, 2009


Who we are and what we can deal with is proven in a storm,
Yes, in a storm,
Especially our faith,
Because the unadulterated truth is that anyone can give praise and thanks,
During the good time,
But let me tell you, when you can thank God for your trials and your tribulations,
You are putting faith to work,
Because something I know for sure,
Is that for those most blessed,
The dark days,
Can be like walking through mud made of charcoal,
I am telling you I know,
I have been through some coal days,
For sure,
Covered with soot and smelling like hell,
But blessings,
Oh my God, I can’t even tell you,
My blessings run me over, and there have been so many,
I can’t even count ‘em here,
But every time,
I start feeling myself,
Thinking I’m all that,
And believe you me there are times when I do,
Thinking I am the bombest mommi,
God will hit me with something,
That will rock my foundation,
To let me know that I am just a vessel,
And that to whom much is given,
Much is expected and he expects us to acknowledge how blessed we,
And who blessed us...
For real,
So for all of you who are going through something today,
Know that the hard, dark times,
Is just to see what you are made of,
And how much you appreciate what you have and how,
Much you are willing to do for someone else,
Because ultimately,
It is not just about US…
And this too shall pass...



Tuesday, July 28, 2009


Resilience is defined as the ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change…I am claiming that, I have feminine resilience, oh yes I do…
Many women do, the women in my life before me certainly had it,
And thanks be to God, they passed it on,
A friend recently told me,
That she is astonished at how easily I move on,
When something has occurred or the world has turned upside down,
We were actually talking about a shift in leadership at our church,
I told her simply,
I only want the Word as it is written,
I don’t care who is bringing it, so long as he is bringing it,
We have to move on, move forward,
A couple of years ago,
One of my sons was robbed,
Someone broke in his place and robbed him at gunpoint,
Lo and behold it turned out to be someone he knew,
Really well,
But after fear and anger subsided,
I was just glad and grateful,
That he was alive,
And then I prayed for and forgave the young man,
Who had sat at my table,
Because what I knew for sure,
Is that I could allow anger and fear to consume me,
But I made the decision to forgive,
And move on,
As did my son,
He even visited the young man in jail,
Because he had to forgive in order to move on,
There was someone in our life who thought we should stay mad forever,
But we knew better because
To not recover from a thing,
Or to be so bound by it,
That you carry it around in your heart and mind everyday,
Is a soul destroyer,
And body killer,
And what being resilient does,
Is acknowledges the fact that you have a right to be mad, hurt, sad, or scared,
But to know that at the end of the day,
In order to move on, live, be free,
We have to bounce back,
It is much like when your skin is ashy,
If you scrub off that dead skin,
Then ladle on the cocoa butter,
It is amazing how that skin will plump back up,
Ready to face another day,
You know I’m right!



Monday, July 27, 2009


Often I am asked who I mentor for,
Usually the persons asking want me attached to an organization,
Of some type, I am not…officially,
Then the question becomes how did you become a mentor,
And that is a bit more convoluted,
I think it started when I was in fourth grade and was asked by Mrs. Townsend,
A second grade teacher to help her with her class twice a week,
She wanted me to talk about the joy of reading to kids,
Two years younger than me!
As the years progressed I always found myself in a situation where I was being asked to talk to someone about something,
I guess it was because I was always older than my years,
And being almost six feet tall by thirteen gave me a sense of growness,
And I carried myself (so they say) as if I knew some thangs…Whew!
Anyway by the time I was grown, a mother and educated,
I had gained a rep of sorts for being a straight talking, honest, willing to reveal myself to help someone else kind of a woman,
By the time I actually became employed as a counselor,
I had already put in work,
In years of late,
Most of the young women I try to assist,
Were recommended to me by my sons, (MY BOYS THINK I CAN DO ANYTHING!)
Or someone who has seen me at work,
And I try,
In a few cases I have been unable to do a thing,
But often I listen,
And try to model behaviors that someone would want to emulate,
Mostly I share what I have been through and have overcome,
In order to be here and do the things I have done,
As the kids say,
‘I keep it real…’
Or try to…
Because I believe it is absolutely necessary for those of us,
Who have rolled through somebody’s hood,
And made it out relatively intact,
To share with as many as we can,
That though it is not a crystal staircase by any means,
It is definitely doable,
That even when we fall off track we have to get back up and get back on,
And most importantly as an elder,
I remember being young and silly,
And made (make) mistakes all the time,
But I know for sure that judging young people won’t change a thing,
Though we do have to love them tough and hold them accountable,
But they have got to know that we love them,
Believe in them,
And want what is best for them,
Even when they don’t…know that for themselves...


Sunday, July 26, 2009


This morning I sat in church and the Pastor's message resonated in me...

I knew I was in a season of change, again,

I try to stay in a growth pattern and leave myself open for whatever comes,

And mostly I have been able to do that,

I know, inherently that there are many who don't agree with me or my way,

But that is okay,

Because something I understood from a very young age is that when you get through all the stuff,

There Is A Blessing In It,

There were some times in my young days,

When things were bad,

Real bad,

I felt often that I had to go it alone,

And often I did, mostly I did,

But there seemed to something in me that was broken,

Hold up, it was a good broken,

Because I was completely unable to blame anyone for my circumstances,

Or allow my circumstances to stop me from doing anything,

And I had many friend who allowed the generational curses to hinder them,

I just refused,

I kept my head in a book,

My legs closed,

My heart open,

And was always future focused,

God was bringing me through,

To use me when I didn't even have enough sense to know it,

I can remember as a very frightened teenager,

Reading Proverbs and Corinthians over and over incessantly,

And trying as hard as I could to live good, do right,

I fell short more times than I can count,

But every single day I got up and moved forward...

And that is the message that I want to give to my children,

Maurice and Malik,

My grandchildren,
My Nieces and Nephews...
Charlie and Kecia in particular,

And all the children who have come through my life,

There are too many to mention and I don't want to forget any,

But I will mention a special few,

My daughter in love, Paasch,

My child by my heart, Schae

My many children from the Job Corps years,

And my young work Mentee, Sophia,

That there is nothing in the world that is not overcomable with true faith in God,

The ability to forgive others,

And to forgive yourselves,

And to know that we must dance to the orchestra that God has set within us,

When he takes something away it is only to prepare us for something better,

A lost job means there is a better job,

A lost relationship means there is a another relationship,

But my children we have to accept our responsibility in doing the right things,

And moving in the right directions,

And accepting that every day on the street is not a good day,

But in every dark day,



angelia aka mama deep

Friday, July 24, 2009


I tell folks all the time to only do things, because they want to...
If doing something for someone is a burden to you, don't do it,
Because there is absolutely no blessing in burdened giving,
You truly block your blessings when you give with your hands and not from your heart,
I have found myself in situations in times past,
Where I was doing things, saying yes to some stuff,
That didn't feel good or right and brought me no joy,
But I felt I had to...
And I know why,
Because at times we are so damned fearful,
That if we don't do a thing,
Then the person who has asked for it,
Won't love us any longer,
It is all tied to love, you know...
We all have an inherent desire to be loved and accepted,
But what I had to learn is this,
And sometimes no is the only answer that works,
So the next time you get ready to give something, or do something,
Ask yourself,
Am I doing this from my heart,
With no conditions,
Or expectations,
Of reciprocation,
And even then,



Thursday, July 23, 2009

One Man's Mediocrity...

I am always tickled, umm light brown,
When I hear people say stuff like I’m tired of mediocrity,
Usually the person doing the saying isn’t doing the doing,
I was talking to a young person who is sort of employed,
And he went on and on ad nauseum about how he was tired of the mediocrity,
After I had heard as much of that….as I could take,
I turned to him telling him,
‘You aren’t living mediocre…’
Mediocrity is defined as having a moderate ability or value,
You have beyond a moderate ability, you just aren’t doing a thing with it,
He looked at me,
Kind of surprised because usually I listen and keep my opinion to myself,
But I was a bit put out with all that,
Whining and posturing,
Folks who aren’t doing a thing,
And who Poo Poo those who are handling their business,
And want to call it mediocrity,
Well my children,
Mediocrity in same cases,
Feed children,
Pay for houses,
Purchase the things you need,
On the other hand working below your abilities or values,
Is just…well trifling…
Yes I said it…
There is something to be said for mediocrity,
If it takes care of you and yours…
And you are beholden to no one...



Wednesday, July 22, 2009


What is in a name…
I think of that sometimes and I know there is much in a name,
My kids names translates to handsome one and king, and take my word,
They believe….grinning…
During the late part of 2005 when I held, ‘Black’s Obsession’ in my hot little hands,
I was trying to decide what I was going to call myself,
I knew that Vernon was going to be in there somewhere,
It was time to do that maiden name thang,
A bit, but I just didn’t know…
So after much consideration, I found my Nom de Plume,
Pen Name if you will,
I became acVernon Menchan,
There were many extenuating circumstances and reasons,
But I must admit the biggest was to hide, in plain site, so to speak…
The first book had very little sex,
But there was some cussing and language to be sure,
After all I was writing as a Black man who was all about keeping it real,
And I wasn’t sure how folks would feel,
Mostly family folks,
Didn’t want to care but I did,
Ironically when people talk about my books,
That first one remains a cult favorite for many,
Because those who got it,
Knew it wasn’t about the language but the message,
After book four I was tired of writing under a pen name,
Diana Ross’ ‘I’m Coming Out’ rang in my head,
So I took the safe route and penned my first young adult book,
As…Angelia Vernon Menchan…who I be…
Now on my fourth book as me…
Someone asked me the other day when they discovered,
I was writing, MRS. BLACK?
If I were going back to my pen name,
And they told me they hoped not,
Well I disabused them of that notion,
Told them it had never even occurred to me,
I am so far removed from being concerned about what anyone thinks about my books,
And understanding that what people take from it is about them,
Not about me,
I am a writer and I write,
And I was doing myself and my work,
A great disservice by hiding in the closet…
Because I believe in my stories,
My characters,
And most importantly I believe in me,
And Angelia Vernon Menchan,



Tuesday, July 21, 2009

The Story In It...

I love writing, but almost as much writing I love getting the food for my stories,
Most of what I write about comes from an observation, a snippet of overheard conversation and my extremely, even at my age, vivid imagination…
I was talking to my cousin the other day and she was astonished that all my books weren’t true stories…she just couldn’t believe I could make all that stuff up…
Grinning inside, I thought, ‘Girl there are some stories in this big Capricorn head…
As for the observations, I love that,
Watching people and constructing a story,
Recently I watched a family,
The older couple,
Their son, daughter-in-law and baby,
They fascinated me,
Because while the father and mother were very involved with the baby,
The grandfather was less so,
And the grandmother not at all,
In fact she seemed completely uninvolved,
Though they were all sitting together,
Of course I was fascinated and writing out the story…
Scenario One:
She was not feeling the daughter-in-law…
But why not the baby…

I mentioned it to my man,
Who rolled his eyes,
Telling me, ‘Baby there is no story there…’
I continued to watch and still nothing,
Zip…too interesting…
Days later I discovered that the grandmother/mother,
Really wasn’t the grandmother/mother after all,
She was recently married to the grandfather/father…
I knew there was a story there,
There was just a bit too much coolness,
And disconnectedness…
Not as interesting as I would write it,
But interesting non-the-less…
From that little bit of observation,
I could write a whole book,
Hmm let me see…
Educated parents, not pleased with educated son’s choice of bride,
Bride a bit to…umm urban for parents,
Son hoping that parents will come around once baby is born,
However, that is not what happens,
Lots of underlying tensions and unspoken disapproval…
We will see….


Monday, July 20, 2009

The Realness...

Something I absolutely love is the realness in people,
Folks with no affectations, who know exactly who they are and are not trying to be anything else...
They have been through all kinds of things,
And come out with their spirits and attitudes intact,
This weekend I was at my man's family reunion,
And on Saturday morning I sat across from a woman I have known all my life,
She is about fourteen years older than me,
And I can remember when she was probably in her twenties,
I always thought she looked fabulous,
And in her mid sixties, she still does,
Smooth skin, lovely hair, nice jewelry and best of all a beautiful, almost innocent smile,
Listening to her talk made me feel nice and comfortable,
There was an honesty and openness about her that was so damn...fresh!
Nothing jaded, nothing pretensious,
Just a beautiful woman who was lovely and happy with her husband, her life,
Who she was... Beautiful Betti...
There is also a young woman related to me by marriage,
I have not communicated with her much, lately,
But recently she found me on facebook,
And she has been sending me these very talky,
Wonderful messages, filled with her life and goings on,
And Love...
And she is as real as she can be,
Done been through some thangs,
Had some ups and some downs and still as happy as can be,
Lovely Edna...
I just absolutly love that,
Because life is so short,
There is so much going on,
And it is so nice to be around people who want to be around you,
Who that no matter what they have been through,
They have never allowed anything to steal their joy!




Friday, July 17, 2009


Words are so powerful,
What you say and how you say it can determine the course of your life,
I see a lot of words, randomly tossed about,
Without thought,
Particularly in this age of instant messages,
And the like,
We just have to make sure that the words we say are the ones,
We want to be defined by,
As a writer,
This is particularly important and critical,
I recall after I had written my first book,
I was considering a rewrite,
Had been told it was necessary,
Told my first book read too literary...
Well after I read the suggested changes,
I halted the process,
Though I had paid,
Because I knew those words were not ones I wanted as,
Representative of my work...
It was a hard and expensive lesson,
But 0ne I value,
That is why I tell the young people in my life,
Be careful of the words you put out there,
And make sure they taste sweet on the tongue,
Because you might have to eat them...


Thursday, July 16, 2009


Almost two years ago I posted a blog about Failing Forward,
I got a lot of hits on that one,
The premise was that we will all fail,
For real, for real,
But what we have to do is fail forward,
Once we have accepted what has happened,
Accept our responsibility for it,
Had a drink or three,
Wallowed around,
Cussed, cried and complained,
We have to take the manure,
Use it as fertilizer,
Sprinkle all over some things,
So they can grow…
Accepting the fact that once we have hit our personal bottom,
There is nowhere to go but up,
But I am telling you right here,
You have got to get your head and your heart,
Not to mention your attitude
Because what you say is what you are,
If you spew forth negativity,
Blame everyone, even yourself,
You will get absolutely nowhere…
When I am feeling ‘woe is me’…
I allow myself my little pity party…
I might sit in the house all day,
Watching movies,
Having a glass or three…or a bottle…
Of wine…
Go to bed early…
Then the next morning,
The one thing I know for sure is that I have to,
Dust my fat…(my man says phat) butt…
Off and get back in the game,
Because there are things to do,
People to reach,
And life to live,
So put in efforts every day,
To do those things you need to do,
Even if you don’t want to do them,
Because fail we will,
But fail forward we must…


Wednesday, July 15, 2009


This morning as I was driving across the bridge I was thinking;
‘If this bridge suddenly weren’t here, there are a couple of routes I could take…’
At the same time, however, I knew that I wouldn’t enjoy those others as much,
Main Street is just buildings…and…flotsam,
I-95 is well, I-95,
But crossing that bridge is peaceful,
The moon and stars are still out when I leave home,
And the lights are twinkling and the St. Johns River is barely moving down below,
I love it…
And that led me to what I chose to write about today…
Burning Bridges,
Metaphorically, of course…
I have always been careful of ending things,
By burning a bridge,
When I am done with a job,
I give a notice, leave with my rep intact,
Trying to insure that if the bottom ever falls out,
That I can potentially go back,
Or at a minimum, get a good reference…
Because one just never knows,
I am even more cautious with my relationships,
I remove myself carefully and gradually from entanglements,
That aren’t working for me because it is best to make sure it is someone,
You are done with or won’t ever need again…
Again, you just never know,
Now there are a couple of bridges,
I have taken a torch to,
Walked up to it with a flame in my hand,
And stood there watching it burn to the ground,
Sink into the deep,
But believe you me,
I had given it much thought,
Engaged in mad prayer and made sure,
That I was done,
Knowing that if even it were my last bridge,
I would take my chances,
In the swim…
Because sometimes,
Every now and then you have to know when to have,
A burnt bridge party,
Because a ragged,
Falling apart bridge,
Is like having no bridge at all….


Tuesday, July 14, 2009


One of the things that seem to hold some people back most,
Is not wanting to put in work,
Or wait for anything…
We live in a microwave, twitter in seconds universe and if it doesn’t happen,
With a quickness…we are inclined to move on,
But one of the things we have to learn is that we sometimes have to take baby steps,
Move slowly, allow things to build,
I recall being a geometry student in Ms. Clark’s class and having her write in my yearbook these very words…
‘Small steps can take you big places…’
For some reason I never forgot those words from when I was fourteen,
Almost, yikes!
Forty years ago…they resonated with me,
I always recall when my husband was in the military,
I would start a new career and reinvent myself every three years or so,
And just about when I would get near the top,
It would be time to move,
I will not lie and say that at times it was not frustrating,
But I knew what I had signed on for and that my marriage and life,
Was worth more than careers or money,
I learned to think of it as just adding to my knowledge and skill base,
When we moved back to Florida ten years ago…
I immediately saw the fruit of my labors,
I was hired in a job that I wasn’t really qualified to do,

In fact I received a letter to that effect the day after I was hired!
But the little bits and pieces I had learned and the people I had met along the way,
Provided enough to get in there,
After that I showed and proved and I was rewarded,
Over and over again…
And ended up in the same place as many who had toiled away in the same job for decades,
That is how God works,
And it is also how sticking with something,
Learning to work hard before the party,
And being willing to start over and reinvent one’s self as required,
God knows there were times when I wanted to do it all faster,
But he also knew that the best rewards often come to those who are willing to wait…



Monday, July 13, 2009


From Thursday to Saturday I was in a major funk,
I mean, woe is me, leave me alone,
I want to sleep all day funk…
I must confess, first off the bat, that my funk was self-induced,
And truly had very little to do with me,
I loved God, loved my man, was still gainfully employed,
Living well, truly blessed…
But I was doing something I have been guilty of most of my life,
Taking on the woes of those I love…
I am guilty, I must confess…
Mostly I am as cool as chilled cucumber,
But when something goes on with those I love most,
It effects me as though it were actually happening to me,
That has always been my Achilles heel…
It is frustrating for my man,
I know because he only assumes his own issues,
I tell him and truly mean it,
He is my hero…to be in that place where you truly,
That things will be okay,
Or they won’t but to simply pray and allow God to work,
I am grateful for him,
Saturday afternoon, I forced myself to go out,
A friend was having a function,
And I was grateful,
It was a wonderful distraction,
And I felt better by the time I was done,
But what really helped me,
Immensely was when I was sitting in church,
And my pastor preached about suffering,
Phillipians Chapter One, 29-30,
He broke it down and brought and I could literally feel,
The self-induced weight of what I was feeling float from my shoulders,
I felt as though he had been peeking in my window,’
Reading my journal,
Seeing my dreams and stealing my thoughts,
But what I know in actuality is that God was sending me a message,
That I needed to heed,
To pray fervently,
Trust him,
To impart what he has given me to those who will listen,
And to know that what I always say is true,
Everyday is a new day and we can choose to do our best in it…



Friday, July 10, 2009


I always wonder what people think about before they take a course of action...
Who do they consider...
If they think about the consequences of what they do and how they will affect others...
I have always tried to do that,
I can remember as a teen,
I would think if I did that it will reflect badly on my mom,
I actually thought about stuff like that,
Once I became a wife, I considered my husband,
He was a soldier and what family did reflected on a husband,
So I tried to handle myself accordingly,
Once I became a mother,
I thought of the same things,
How will this affect my kids,
If I quit my job,
Will my kids be impacted,
Thoughts like that immediately changed what I wanted to do,
To what I had to do,
Recently I watched a documentary,
About the families and lives that killers touch,
It was focused on do people consider the families of the people they kill,
And even begin to understand the devastation they leave behind,
Of course they don't,
Because it seems we are caught up in a world of,
I believe that if we sat still and considered our actions,
And how they impacted others, it would force us,
To make better decisions,
Because thinking about a thing and it's ramifications,
Have saved me from a lot of things,
Job losses,
Possible divorce,
Maybe even jail time,
Because I tell you what there have been some times,
When grabbing my purse and leaving my job,
Seemed the thing to do,
But I considered,
Or times when marriage was one of those downswings,
And my darkside said,
Girl leave his azz, you don't need this,
But I considered...
And there have been a few times,
When I wanted to straight up beat someone down,
Down to the ground,
But I considered,
Thought about the consequences of my actions and the potential,
Harm they would cause to the lives of the ones I love,
And I made a different choice...
Just a little consideration goes along way....


Thursday, July 9, 2009

Anthony Hamilton - Do You Feel Me - Free Music Download, MP3, ARTISTdirect Network

Anthony Hamilton - Do You Feel Me - Free Music Download, MP3, ARTISTdirect Network

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Well I think it’s time for mama to talk about sex,
Yeah you heard me sex…
The first thing I want to say to my young ladies is that for many men,
Sex is just that… sex,
The working of two bodies to a mutual end,
A satisfying end…
If you are lucky…
But it is still about the umm… end…
And I’m not trying to hurt anyone’s feelings,
But here it is,
If he is not in love with you,
Chances are that no matter how good,
The ummm sex is,
It will not get him to fall in love with you,
Because for some folks, the naa naa is just the naa naa…
And if there is one thing in abundance in this world it is more naa naa,
Naa naa over here, naa naa over there…naa naa everywhere!
So if he is married and decides to accept some loving from you,
Or even if he’s not…
Don’t believe the hype that the sex will be so awesome,
That he will pack up and leave home and hearth,
Chances are that will not happen…
We are going to have to teach our girls that the best sex,
Is the sex that occurs with people who love and respect each other,
And that it is not a way to get something,
Well it is a way to get something, something you can’t get rid of,
But I digress…
It is not a way to get something,
Because if that is how you get it,
Chances are you won’t keep it,
I can recall years ago asking a friend,
Why she shared herself so freely,
And she told,
‘Well they say they love me and that I am the best…’
My question was, ‘Where are they now…’
She didn’t have an answer…
There is no answer…
Because I’m telling you,
For so many,
It ain’t nothing…
Just something to do,
And my sisters you are worth more than that…
For sure…


Wednesday, July 8, 2009


I can always remember hearing people, black people say that ‘Mother Wit’ was more important than many things…’Mother Wit’ is defined simply as natural intelligence or wit…or something you received from being taught by the elders…
Yesterday I was thinking about my mom and all the things she taught me,
Some by saying,
Some by doing,
And a few things by me doing the opposite of what she did,

And said...
Yes, we can learn to not do certain things, simply by observance,
Our relationship had several layers…chapters if you will…
The first chapter was when I was a young girl,
I thought of my mama as the coolest, prettiest woman on the planet,
She could be stern, but she was also playful when it suited her,
She was also mercurial and temperamental…I inherited that…
But mostly I knew how much she loved me…
When I reached my teens we weren’t as close,
She had chosen her life and as a somewhat self-absorbed teen, I wasn’t feeling her choices.
We weren’t as close, but there was never a day when I doubted her love,
Once I was married and a mom our relationship took on a different tone,
We had a commonality beyond being mother and daughter,
And what I remember and love most is that she allowed me to handle my business,
She never told me how to deal with my husband,
Or how to raise my children,
She was there if I needed her,
But a big part of that might be because I kept my business to myself,
My mother never knew what went on in my marriage,
Or even what went on with my kids for the most part,
That was what we called MK Menchan family business…
She thanked me for that before she died,
Which brings me to the most bittersweet part of what we had…
The two years before she died,
We became closer than ever,
In small ways I had become one of her caretakers,
And that wasn’t easy for her but she dealt with it,
But mostly we became friends,
I can remember the times she and I sat on the sofa and girl-talked,
She told me so many things about her life,
She was thirty when I was born so she had done a lot of living,
I shared with her some things she didn’t know about me,
Oh what revelations…
Mostly we laughed…a lot,
Sometimes near the end,
We would just sit quietly,
Saying nothing,
But enjoying what we had between us,
We were shoulder to shoulder and hip to hip,
And the best thing was that I still knew how much my mama,
Loved her Angi…only she called me that,
And I know she knew how much I loved her,
To this day when I am struggling with something that I can’t tell anyone,
Or talk to anyone about,
All I have to do is think of mama,
And I can see her sideways smile,
Much like mine…
And the wink from her almond shaped eyes,
Just like mine,
And all is well with my world…


Tuesday, July 7, 2009


There is not much that scares me,
Honestly, I am not saying that to be braggy or cocky,
It’s the truth,
My mom raised her girls to be pretty fearless,
She would often tell us, ‘What don’t kill you will make you stronger…’
She also taught us honesty and how to stand on our own two…
She often said, ‘Every woman should work, or be able to…’
For those things I’m grateful,
Because it allowed me to venture out,
Take chances,
Stretch my wings and fly,
I have finally found the things that scares me,
Make my mouth dry and my heart race,
And this is a person who will….
Whew that it something to be scared of,
You all know what I mean,
They will stand in your face, straight up lying, and never flinch or bat an eye,
Or will kiss you on the mouth,
While picking your pocket,
Or create such drama around them,
That while you find what they are doing or saying,
You find yourself believing what they are saying,
Because they can out act,
Meryl Streep…
Once I know that,
I stay out of their way,
Feed them with the proverbial long-handled spoon,
While at the same time wondering,
Why and How…
Why go out like that,
And how did they become that way,
Because you know that some serious…@#$%
Had to happen to create that….
Maybe that is the title for a short story,
I am trying to come up with,
The Great Manipulators and The People They Scare…


Friday, July 3, 2009


One of the greatest MYTHS of all time is that you can love,
Cohabit with, marry...another human animal,
Come on People,
It just ain't so...
This morning the first thing I said to my husband was,
"In thirtyone days, we will be married thirtyone years..."
Sleepily he murmered,
'Ummm' and fell back to sleep...
I lay awake for a bit, thinking about a conversation,
I'd had recently with a young divorcee'...
She was telling me how when she got married,
She was determined she wouldn't put up with stuff,
The way her mama had,
She had an education, her own money and she could take care of herself...
I stayed mum...
She went on a bit further and then admitted,
She missed him and that he was a good guy,
I finally asked then what was the problem,
She told me, he wasn't ambitious enough,
He was perfectly content with the job he had,
And that sometimes he embarrassed her in front of her friends,
I knew but asked why anyway,
She told me the way he talked and didn't know a lot of stuff...
She could barely look at me,
I asked why had she married him,
She told me because she loved him,
He loved her,
He was romantic,
Wasn't caught up in male-female role playing,
And their alone time was well...GOOD...
I didn't have to say a word...
Trying to make it make sense, she said,
She left him because she felt she didn't have to put up with what he was putting down...
I told her,
"Sweetie, you sure didn't, but keep in mind this, we all have to put up with something,
as sure as someone has to put up with us, we will have to put up with them...that my child is called the compromise of life....and next time make sure that what you want is what you get,
or you will spend a lot of time leaving..."
She smiled sadly at me,
Knowing it was true...
But hopefully she was listening,
Because in this life to be coupled,
We all must learn that we have to go through something,
Put up with something,
To have something....


Thursday, July 2, 2009


I have always been fascinated by what makes people tick,
I can sit for hours, people watching,
I suppose that is why I am never bored in airports,
A layover simply gives me time to read and watch people,
And while watching people I make up stories,
Because something that really fascinates me is what attracts people to other people,
And I know it is more than how they look…
I recall when I was a young girl,
I was sitting at the doctor’s office with my mom,
It was right before school and very busy,
Everyone was getting inoculations,
And in walked this couple,
The woman was about six feet tall, and had on heels,
Very shapely and fragrant with perfume...
She was wearing a shiny, tight, blue dress, think it was satin,
And she was nineteen-fifties glamorous,
Red lips, shiny, wavy hair,
The man who was holding her hand was about seven inches shorter than her,
Dressed in a mechanics shirt and had a fringe of hair on his head,
But they were hand in hand with their child and she looked as proud to hold his hand as he was to hold hers…I couldn’t stop looking at them,
My mind racing, wondering…
My mom’s sharp elbow made me stop staring…
But here I am over forty years later and still remember it,
I never forget a thing, I guess that is where my characters come from,
Observations from years past that I write about, with my own twists…

Last night my man and I talked about what attracts people,
Being a man, he immediately said, ‘Looks…at least initially…’
So I asked, ‘What if they don’t look well…you know…’
We went back and forth on that one,
He then said, ‘Well that speaks to the wonder of God, because that means there is someone for everyone…’ He is so cute…my spiritual man…
We never really got anywhere,
Which is never our intent,
We simply love talking about stuff that has no answers,
And I know it is more fun,
At least for me...
To speculate about what attracts people,
And what keeps them attracted,
Because then I can sit down weeks, months or years later,
And incorporate them in a story,
Coming up with my own reasons….

PURCHASE SCHAE’S STORY: A Woman’s Transformation

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

The Aged....

Every morning before my feet hit the floor, I pray,
Thanking God for bringing me to another day,
And for all the blessings he has bestowed upon me,
And for every trial he has taken me through,
Yes, I am even thankful for my trials because that is what has formed me,
Made me appreciate who I am, what I have and what I have to offer…
And for still being here,
Which brings me to what is on my mind,
Yes aging, if we keep living, aging we will,
And I have come to the conclusion that how well we age,
How well we accept aging,
Has much to do with where we are and how we feel about our lives,
Especially as women,
If we feel good about our lives,
Our loves,
Our families,
Our careers,
Chances are real good that we are not tripping about the aging process,
Because we know that we have been blessed and that with,
Love, good food, a bit of exercise, moisturizer and a good attitude,
It is all good,
And hopefully we have realized that not turning heads all the time,
Is not the end of anything…in many ways it's the beginning...
On the other hand,
If we thought we would be young and cute forever,
If we have lived like tomorrow would never come,
Squandered away our resources,
And not appreciated the journey every step of the way,
We just might be struggling with aging,
Feeling that time is running out before we have the chance to get it,
Do it,
Be it,
To that I say, slow down, relax,
Enjoy what you have,
Who you are,
What you bring,
Do what you love…
Allow life to melt on your tongue like Godiva chocolate,
That is what propels me to write more than anything,
I love it,
It rejuvenates me,
Frees me to be a whole lot of different things,
Say many things to as many people as are willing to listen,
And it is something I can do,
For as long as I want to,
That will be here long after I’m gone….



MRS. BLACK? Coming Soon!