Sometimes overlooked are the women who mother all the kids in their community whether they gave birth to them or not. I was community mothered and I am a community mother. My mom, Ora Lee gave birth to me, but a handful of women formed who I am. Mama Lee taught me to stand up for what I believed in and felt was right, even when others felt differently. I was allowed to have a voice so long as that voice was respectful. She would often tell me, ‘Speak your mind, but don’t forget who the mama is!’ To the day she died, she always made me know she was proud of me and my choices.
My Aunt Elouise taught me that hard work and financial integrity takes us a long way. Her mantra was to wake up early, get the work done, because that left more time for play. Also, that anything you purchased should be paid for and early. Finally, my godmother, Ms. Eva, was my role model for loving and nurturing children that we didn’t give birth to. All of the kids in the community were welcomed into her home. We sat at her feet allowing her to read to us and tell us stories of her extremely interesting life. She also was a realist, understanding that young people would always make mistakes and they needed a safe, loving place to go when they colored outside the lines.
I have found myself to be a community mother as well. I gave birth to Maurice II and Malik, however, my nieces and nephews are also my children. I find it my absolute responsibility to chastise them when they go astray and to applaud them when they do what they are supposed to do. The same has been true of any child I run into who needs an ear to listen, a heart to love or a few sharp words to correct. As a community mother I believe in tapping into those gifts a child has and working with them to hone them and when they find it, reminding them that to get anything done, they have to follow the credo, ‘Don’t talk about it, be about it.’
Wouldn’t the world be a better place if we truly lived by the concept of it taking a village to raise a child and community mothered those, most in need. Oh what a legacy, indeed!
Love and Blessings,
angelia
http://www.angeliavmenchan.com/
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