My man has this saying that used to send me over the edge, nowadays we say it and roll with laughter, it is,
“Everything doesn’t have to be said.”
I used to take that personal because usually he mouthed those words when I wanted to say something….
But I have discovered with some reluctance that he sure was on to something…
Everything really doesn’t have to said,
And it certainly doesn’t have to be said in the way so many people say it…
Words are mighty powerful and dependent upon who is doing the saying…
They can be uplifting or demoralizing…
When I was growing up there were so many words we couldn’t say…
I often wondered why…
I guess I thought at that time my mom, grandmother, aunts and godmother were trying to stifle me…
We couldn’t use words such as stupid, or say we hated anyone…
Just wasn’t allowed…
Thanks ancestors….
Many times when I am reading blogs or opinions I am often shocked at how just downright mean some things come across…
I understand that usually the writer isn’t trying to come across as mean…
Somewhere along the line many have confused knowledgeable with in your face opinionated, all the time…in much the way people have confused strong with tough…
But that is another blog for another day…
Very often a simple change of word will change the tone and make the message more poignant…
I have a friend who just can’t understand why she can say something…
And people will leave in droves….never to return again, often taking a side street if they see her coming….
I can say something pretty similar and receive the opposite response…
I have been telling her for decades…it is a simple turn of phrase…
No one wants to be around anyone all the time…
Who lambasts them…
Or talks to them from a place of often misplaced superiority…
And trust me on this, I am not spouting…
“You can get more flies with honey…”
Cause who the heck wants flies?
What I am saying is that there is usually a more humane way to make a point without leaving someone bleeding in the aisles…calm, firm and fair is a blessing….
And if you are unable to do so…
I reluctantly admit…
That there are times when everything doesn’t have to be said….thanks honey...
angelia
