A couple days ago I was talking with an elder and she told me, "You are now where you were headed.." For the first time I didnt have to ask her what she meant, because I felt it also.
I recall being a young child and listening to people whisper about me, "she has been here before," "you know she special, she was born with a veil over her face." "Lawd, she so grown," Ouch...I didnt want anything to do with all that, just wanted to be a kid.
However, life and God always has other plans...he took me through a childhood that was sometimes filled with trauma, placing me in situations that I would say no child should be in...however, I now know that it was preparation for the work I was here to do...
No one really understood, how I walked through that mess on 20th Ave for three years with my head high and my dignity intact,and not giving in to what was going on around me, sometimes having to literally fight my way through...
Or how by thirteen I was working a job and maintaining a GPA...
Or how not completing college to get married made any sense for the smart girl...
Or going back to college with two kids, a soldier husband, and a full time job was even necessary...
Or choosing to write books that grew as I grew...
I can honestly say that sometimes I didnt know where it all came from, I was often all alone in being me...
But now it seems that day by day and layer by layer it is being revealed, God is whispering in my soul, "You waited for me, didnt take your eyes off me, didnt fall for the easy way, NOW I will breathe life into your dreams..."
That my LOVES is where it comes from!
angelia
