Something we all need are support systems…those people we know are going to be there, no matter what occurs…those do or die people…from around age thirteen, I became the support system for a gang of people…some of which should have been mine, but that is another story for another day,,,
Part of who I am and what makes me the me I am is doing all I can to support others, be it my man, my sons, other family members, my friends…however, there are times when the supporters need support…and listen up, you have to listen really carefully….because supporter suck…at asking for support…they suck bad at it…because once a reputation is born…well you know…
I was talking to my man this morning, telling him I was a bit weary and he said…’I know…’ so I asked him, ‘Do you really…’ I could see him thinking…”what does this woman want me to say…” so shoot, I told him…
I told him that sometimes it is hard being a wife, mother, grandmother, budget analyst, deaconess, mentor, writer, publisher, bottle-washer, etc. I know he was thinking, “But, baby, no one tells you to do all those things…’ and he is absolutely right, but they sure do EXPECT it…and I own that too…about two years ago my team of five at work had dwindled to two…and most of the slack I was picking up…worked like a machine until one day I walked into my supervisors office and imploded, or maybe exploded…he was stunned and his exact words were…”Didn’t know you were stressed…you seemed to handle it so well…” At that moment I was mad at my mama, my aunts and my godmother, all those women who had taught me to work so hard and never let them see me sweat…because I realized in that moment that I had taken on too much and all I needed to do was say something….whew…from then on I was better, but I confess, I am still not there...a couple weeks ago one of my mentees got a new job and she sent me a message asking if she could ride in with me…my first response was sure…but upon thinking about it and weighing it I knew I should have said no…because it would mean leaving home at 5 am instead of 5:30 and on days when I wanted to work from home, having to get up anyway…so after much prayer…I told her I couldn’t do it…felt as though I had lost ten pounds…felt a bit guilty, but so much more powerful…baby steps…
There are a couple other things I need to scrape off my plate…but ii need to pray about it…and follow the guidance I am given…but in the mean time, beloved, if you see an aging diva struggling, feel free to offer some assistance…I assure that I will graciously accept….
Now go and purchase your copy of RE-RAMBLED: Food and Thought @ amazon.com or bn.com
angelia
