Angelia Vernon Menchan

Angelia Vernon Menchan is an author, publisher and public speaker who owns two publishing companies, MAMM Productions and Honorable Menchan Media. Mrs. Menchan is also a Budget Officer and former Job Corps Counselor. To date she has published twenty-three books of her own work, both fiction and non-fiction and more than eighty ebook novellas on amazon.com. You can access her bibliography on www.amazon.com search words: Angelia Vernon Menchan




Contact information:
Website: http://acvermen.blogspot.com
Email: acvermen@yahoo.com
Phone numbers: 904 714 2272 904 303 2679

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Discretion...Please...

I have always found myself fascinated by the shock on folk's face when they discover someone has been telling their business....particularly fascinated when they are the ones who started telling it....
The best way to have a secret kept is not to ever tell it...
I am often asked why I have so little drama surrounding me....
And I tell folks it's pretty simple, I do unto others as I would have them do unto me,
And mostly I mind my own business...when someone tells me something, confidentially, I try to be like Fort Knox...
Highly important for me is I am very careful about what I share and with whom...
I can talk all day long, but am very careful about what I put out there,
Because I know that once it hits the air it is up for grabs...
Sometimes I flub it...
Most recently I made an off-hand comment to someone,
We were actually talking about one of my books,
And I was glib about something, trying to be frivolous for a minute or two...
And every single time that person gets the opportunity to mention it,
They do, making sure there is an audience...it's actually amusing, because as my kids say, 'It ain't about nothing'
However, there is a lesson in there...for sure...
I have three major rules of thumb about who not to over-share with...
#1 THE PERSON WHO TELLS ALL THEIR OWN BUSINESS...
Anyone who tell the most intimate details of their lives can not be trusted with your business. In many cases they can't help it, they simply don't have what it takes not to tell it. So unless you want it out there...proceed with great caution....
#2 THE PERSON WHO IS NOSY OR PRYS...
This person will ask the most unbelievable questions, they always want to know the most intimate, minute details of everything. They literally froth at the mouth while asking. You have to wonder why they want the information and what they plan to do with it. I don't ask anything, my motto is, if someone wants me to know something, they will tell me...period. And I expect the same in reciprocation....
#3 THE PERSON WHO ALWAYS BRINGS IT
The Bringer is always ready to tell you negative stuff about someone, usually someone you care about, your man, your friend or a family member and they often say things like, "I'm not trying to gossip', 'I wouldn't put up with that if I were you', 'I'm just looking out for you' or something along those lines. Unless, this person has a proven track record with you, proceed with extreme caution because sometimes this one is "Misery Loving Company'....in drag....

The beauty is that if any of these things occur, it's really easy to change...just stop it, already, become quiet, and you will usually find those folks not talking to you any longer, they will move on to more fertile ground...honestly....

Smooches and Blessings,
angelia

7 comments:

Poetic Genesis said...

Let the congregation say 'AMEN'

much luv

G-Nice

Angelia Vernon Menchan said...

SMOOCHES!!!!

love
angelia

Yasmin said...

AMen...again!
xoxo

Gwyneth Bolton said...

Mmmmm hmmm

My mother used to have this joke about this woman who would tell everything to every body. She couldn't keep a secret to save her life. Mom would say if you tell her "Be sure not to tell any body." She would answer "I'll be sure to tell everybody." And that old cliche, "any dog that can bring a bone can carry a bone is true." This post is on point, sis.

Gwyneth

Angelia Vernon Menchan said...

Thanks Yas,

Gwyneth,
we had one at my old job, if you wanted something told, you would tell her and tell her not to say anything, many times she would tell it with you standing right there...

Blessings,
angelia

Jennifer C. said...

I am the three monkeys in one. Hear, speak and see no evil. Back in my teen days it was my names bennett and I ain't in it.

msyonnie said...

Amen!!!

I love this post and i deal with these three people everyday at work. When they start running their mouth about "oh your job is so easy and you know they around here saying you don't do anything" i do as a male friend taught me and say "did you see that Usher married that chic Tameka" LOL or something of that nature, this bascially means "huh, i can't hear you." LOL it makes them so mad and i love it!