Angelia Vernon Menchan

Angelia Vernon Menchan is an author, publisher and public speaker who owns two publishing companies, MAMM Productions and Honorable Menchan Media. Mrs. Menchan is also a Budget Officer and former Job Corps Counselor. To date she has published twenty-three books of her own work, both fiction and non-fiction and more than eighty ebook novellas on You can access her bibliography on search words: Angelia Vernon Menchan

Contact information:
Phone numbers: 904 714 2272 904 303 2679

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Don't Go For That!

One of the hardest things to articulate to people is to only hold themselves accountable…
It is hard, I grant you that,
But it is freeing…
What I mean by that is this,
People do to you what you allow,
If someone is disrespecting you,
There had to be a first time, now think back to how you handled it,
If you acted like it was okay, pretended it didn’t happen or turned the other cheek,
Until your head was spinning like that girl in the exorcist,
Then it happened again and a pattern of behavior was set,
Then months later when you go crazy on the person,
They are puzzled because they have become so comfortable with how they are behaving,
Thinking you must like it, you didn’t say anything,
So my unasked for advice is simple,
The very first time you feel dissed, maligned, underappreciated, overworked, whatever…
Part your lips and say something,
No cussing, histrionics or beat downs necessary,
At least not the first time…
It is amazing how it works,
They might not stop doing it, but they will surely stop doing it to you…
And just might think about it before they do it to someone else,
Because sometimes folks just don’t know until you hip ‘em to it…
I recall several years ago someone made a remark to me about someone of a different ethnicity than the two of us,
I kindly, gently but strongly asked them not to do that again,
They were a bit puzzled because it wasn’t a Black remark,
I patiently explained that my philosophy is this,
“If you talk to me about them, what will stop you talking to them about me”…
Periodically they tell me that when they get ready to say something…
I jump in their heads, making them think about it,
My work was done,’
So remember the old saying, “Those who stand for nothing, will go for anything!”

Love and Blessings!


Anonymous said...

Good points. It goes to my #2 of things that I've learned over the years--People will treat you how you allow them to treat you.

Jennifer C. said...

The same way we nip bad behavior from our children is the same way we need to nip disrespectful and down right rude behavior to adults. I don't tolerate any disrespect. My mother will tell you I've always been this way my entire life. I don't let anything slide by any means by anyone.

Maybe that's why people believe I'm mean. Oh well my job is done.

Carole McDonnell said...

So true. Gotta admit, I am wuss and wimp extraordinaire. But sometimes I am so surprised that someone is being a jerk, it pretty much leaves me speechless with wonder. Gotta work on this. Thanks. -C