Angelia Vernon Menchan

Angelia Vernon Menchan is an author, publisher and public speaker who owns two publishing companies, MAMM Productions and Honorable Menchan Media. Mrs. Menchan is also a Budget Officer and former Job Corps Counselor. To date she has published twenty-three books of her own work, both fiction and non-fiction and more than eighty ebook novellas on amazon.com. You can access her bibliography on www.amazon.com search words: Angelia Vernon Menchan




Contact information:
Website: http://acvermen.blogspot.com
Email: acvermen@yahoo.com
Phone numbers: 904 714 2272 904 303 2679

Monday, August 18, 2008

Family Defined...

Family by definition is very clear and finite,
However, something I have learned and learned to appreciate is that family is a heart and soul thing…
Many times, those who become our family are not tied to us by blood, but how we feel
About them, how they feel about us, how we bond and treat one another,
For years I clung by my teeth and nails to the rigid family definition,
Making a lot of decisions about people, places and things based on that…
As such I lost out on a lot of amazing relationships,
What I had to discover is that I can love blood,
But not buy into, be accepting of or put up with any old thing,
Simply because a person is blood-tied to us does not in any way mean,
We have to buy into or condone their madness,
Or more importantly spend our dwindling time left on this planet, sucking up whatever they are putting out because of ‘feelings’ mostly of guilt,
What I had to learn to do was in some cases create family situations,
Spend time with people who value me,
Who I value,
Who only want from me some shared time,
Who aren't trying to control what I do based on what they can or can't do...
And have no problems with reciprocation…
It has not always been easy, but it sure has allowed me to have better relationships,
More equal encounters, leaving me with choices as to how I spend my time,
And with whom…
I will have to quote one of my mentees on this…
“Growing up is work!”
And as I told her…
“But it sure is worth it…ultimately!”

Blessings,
angelia

6 comments:

JC Martin said...

Yeah when growing up we can't wait to be grown, but it's not as easy as when we are young making those life long connections.

This reminds me of the Toys "R" Us song: I don't want to grow up...

Angelia... said...

Grown is a lifetime walk,,,

smooches!

angelia

CaroleMcDonnell said...

Super true!!!! -C

Angelia... said...

Thanks Madame C!

Blessings,,,

angelia

Anonymous said...

I agree, family isn't only about those connected by blood. I have some family, that I've never met and maybe never will, but that doesn't stop me from loving them, valuing them, and being there for them the best way I can. Ain't that right Mama Deep?

((hugs))

G-Nice

Angelia... said...

So right, G-Nice, So Right!

SMOOCHES!