One of the hardest things today for so many is to understand that wants and needs aren’t the same, we have gotten them so confused in our minds, that they blur together…fortunately, I learned early on…growing up we had all our needs met and many wants, but the wants we received was on my mom’s terms not ours…I can recall wanting a movie projector for Christmas when I was twelve…mama said, ‘Maybe’…and I knew better than to ask again, I also knew that my grades would have to stay tight and the next months leading up to Christmas I would have to be on my Ps and Qs…about age 13, I discovered my love for shoes…mama and I were in Belk’s school shopping and some really snazzy alligator loafers caught my eye…I wanted those loafers, mama looked at me like I was crazy and told me I better get those $15.00 Bass Weejuns, which was a lot of money at the time and really good shoes, that I had really loved prior to seeing the others…she told me; ‘People with jobs get those kinds of shoes which were twice as much…’ three week later I had a job….and though I have made some financial missteps since then, I have never forgotten to not confuse what I want with what I need…I need somewhere to live, and food and water….I want four books a month and new shoes, regularly…and I know that when something more important is due such as property taxes or such, that shoes and books will have to wait…if I cannot afford both…and blessedly due to my own person frugality and moreso, God’s favor I can…
This is a message that I am continually imparting to the young people in my life, that they have to first focus on what they need and then conquer wants; it seems so hard for them to understand that eating out is a luxury not a need…also that good shoes that cover your feet are just as good as designer ones (touche’), or that if you know how much you are going to have each month, spending more than that is foolhardy…because even that isn’t promised to you…and I totally understand…
We live in an I want it and I want it now world, everything is quick, fast and in a hurry…and until recently all you had to do was want a credit card, a house or car you couldn’t afford and bam, there is was…however, once you had those things; oftimes you were living inside without necessities while rolling through the hood showing off wants….the madness has got to stop…
Listen up, learn to pay your bills on time, make sure if there are fifteen days between paydays, that you purchase fifteen days worth of food when you have money and that a meal out will usually pay for two in, and if you continue to work hard, save a little bit and do without all the luxuries that aren’t really important, you will discover that in time, you can have your needs and your wants met without doing without…anything…through God’s grace…trust me on this one, been there and done all that…
SMOOCHES~~~
Angelia
www.angeliamenchan.com
7 comments:
Good post, sis! This is a lesson I've, unfortunately, had to learn through the School of Hard Knocks but always a good reminder.
This should be required reading material for all highschoolers. Preach Angelia!
Rhonda~
thanks ladies~~
angelia
As usual your right on point
As a teen, I had limited things. I had to learn to make due with the little I had. I had about 5 or 6 outfits I had to mix and match each week. Sometimes I wore a few of my mom's clothes to avoid wearing the same outfit each week.
Now I have a bunch of clothes and shoes, not nearly as much as I want. I learned early how to make things look like more than they were worth. To this day I have folks saying I "dress-up" for work. I just like nice things and I pay less than they think for my clothes.
I still hold on to money. Some thing I hold on too tight. LOL. Yet they are quit to ask to borrow. SMH. I learned how to dress nice early in life and appreciate what I have. I make sure I have what I need and I get to enjoy more of my wants, not all my wants.
Thanks Linda,
Shae,
most of us in early times did what you did, we didnt have access to charge cards and the like...can remember when my boys were young, I went to the PX and placed their clothes on layaway for school as soon as school ended and for Christmas once the school things were purchased. That way they could have good, quality clothing that would last and I would be debt free...
angelia
Great post Angelia and so very true.
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