Angelia Vernon Menchan

Angelia Vernon Menchan is an author, publisher and public speaker who owns two publishing companies, MAMM Productions and Honorable Menchan Media. Mrs. Menchan is also a Budget Officer and former Job Corps Counselor. To date she has published twenty-three books of her own work, both fiction and non-fiction and more than eighty ebook novellas on You can access her bibliography on search words: Angelia Vernon Menchan

Contact information:
Phone numbers: 904 714 2272 904 303 2679

Tuesday, March 22, 2011


Yesterday I arrived home a bit tired. Had been on travel all the previous week, the weekend flew by on wings and Monday was filled with paper and red ink after not having been at my desk in ten days. Walking in I knew there was enough food for dinner, so my goal was to sit very still for a bit and watch a bit of television.
Usually my TV drug of choice is court shows /news programs but yesterday I decided to go the lifetime, chick TV route.

In doing so, I happened upon Basketball Wives on VH1. I had heard about it, knew the premise, several lovely wives, girlfriends, fianc├ęs of Bballers had gotten together and created a reality type show based on their reality as women in love with ballers.
Before going in I knew the women would be lovely, dressed in designer wear, jeweled and such. However, I was a bit surprised that they weren’t all late teens, early twenties, many were on the far side of 30, and lovely nonetheless.
So I watched with fascination, there was much wine drinking, talking about the men in their lives who had left them, cheated on them, left them penniless, et al and even some of the men were there for my perusal. Mostly there were lovely, mostly, Black and Hispanic women being mean to each other. Lots of talking behind backs and the like, also, a few fisticuffs and much cussing and use of the F word. Ummph. Pure mindless entertainment, right?

After watching it, I wasn’t so sure, all I could do was wonder, what is the message being sent to young women and what and how do these lovely women see their futures. What happens when they are no longer young, beautiful and nubile? What then?
Many of them have money from their X’s and businesses of their own, but what happens when the shine wears off and the next crop of beauties come along. In their quiet moments do they think of this? It sure did make me think, of all the young lovely girls who are smart but because someone has told them how beautiful or fine they are, they aspire to the finer things in life through the men they meet.

I have seen this play out so many times. In their twenties and thirties, the men line up in droves wanting her on his arm. He will even spring for baubles, rent, nails, or just straight up cash. But, somewhere along the way, usually as she ages, he or they are no longer around or interested and in many instances she is left wondering what happened or filled with enough regret to fill an oversized designer swimming pool. What then? Is she comforted by the memories, the stuff she has accumulated or is she left wondering how things would be if she had made different choices?



Shelia G said...

Good question. Shaunie is the only one who prepared for the "what then" because she used the money she got from her marriage by making investments. But for most of the women and women like them they are "living in the moment." Beauty fades.

Grateful that I was taught to use my mind.

Angelia... said...

I tell you, we laugh when watching but it is really sad. I am glad glad...


Shai said...

Yeah it is sad. What is sadder the women who are not 40, 50 and 60 years old trying to find more "money" and they don't have pensions,etc for retirement.

As advanced as we have become as women, many women still rely on looks and not brains. SMH.

Angelia... said...

so many of us are caught up!

Dera Williams said...

Thanks for this. Someone said the other day: Have we come this far to be reduced to backstabbing, catty, shallow black women on display for the world to see the ignorance? SMH

All we can do is as you are doing is encourage our young women to love themselves, get their education and think about their choices and values. It will go a long way when things look to good to be true. What's that saying, all that glitters ain't gold.

'Cilla said...

I have maybe watched about 15 minutes of one show and I do not see the fasination. I think it sets a bad example for many. I agree with you Momma Deep. And Shelia and Shai and Dera :-)

Linda Chavis said...

You are so right !

the Siriuns said...

Your workmanship on your blog & website is excellent.