Angelia Vernon Menchan

Angelia Vernon Menchan is an author, publisher and public speaker who owns two publishing companies, MAMM Productions and Honorable Menchan Media. Mrs. Menchan is also a Budget Officer and former Job Corps Counselor. To date she has published twenty-three books of her own work, both fiction and non-fiction and more than eighty ebook novellas on amazon.com. You can access her bibliography on www.amazon.com search words: Angelia Vernon Menchan




Contact information:
Website: http://acvermen.blogspot.com
Email: acvermen@yahoo.com
Phone numbers: 904 714 2272 904 303 2679

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

WHOLENESS...

Most of us have periods of brokenness, it is important to our growth to get through that, always working to become whole…however, something occurred to me and continues to occur to me and that is many people, way too many, revel in their brokenness…they embrace it and treat it as a badge of honor, to always be able to walk around with stuff going on and someone to blame…because you do know that blaming others allows you to stay broken…I know you are feeling I need to blame that person who molested me, that man who hit me, that boss who fired me…and to some extent that is true, but only for a time…because the truth is that once you turn the molester, beater in to the authorities, and find another job…it is time to get on and over it…because if you allow that blame to guide you, it will stop you cold from doing anything else except blame…I learned that at thirteen, my home life was helter-skelter and I was walking around with a chip on my shoulder and a teacher called me on it…whew…it hurt like the dickens but I started to work on me…did I overnight get transformed, umm no, but I did learn to make my own way, keep myself out of situations that weren’t good for me and to focus on a life plan that would keep me from those kinds of situations….
I am always startled when I speak to people in their forties, fifties and even older and they talk about things that are decades old as if they had occurred yesterday…not talk about it as a part of their history, but as if each and every day they get up and live in it…whew…breaks my heart…because I know they will probably go to their graves bitter and sad about things they cannot change…the only thing they can change is themselves…and that takes some doing and it also takes some undoing…
By undoing it means there are people in our lives, who though we may be tied to them by blood or circumstance we have to cut them loose…let them go, love them from afar…

that person who is always trying to remind you of where you come from in order to keep you there…let ‘em go…

The person who tells you every negative thing someone says about you, let ‘em go, because you know what they are trying to do is kill your other relationships…I had to learn this because I have had good relationships and someone will come along and tell me something the person said, under the guise that I needed to know it…and the truth is I didn’t. Everyone talks about others and if it isn’t life threatening or life altering it is probably no big deal…just idle chatter...

The man who makes you feel inferior in order to make himself feel superior…let him go…

The friend who always finds something negative to say about your appearance, in order to make herself look better, let her go…

The family members who you never hear from unless they want or need something and get mad at you and stop talking to you if you don’t give it…let ‘em go…
These are all people who aren’t whole and who aren’t interested in your wholeness and sometimes to love em, we might have to leave ‘em…

I have had to learn many of these lessons the hard way, by going through and each day I am still learning, but my mission is WHOLENESS…and I want as many people with as want to go…through God’s grace…

BE PEACE~~~
angelia

7 comments:

LaDena said...

Well said. I have never understood why a person would want to hold on to past hurts or continue to hang with folks that constantly put them down. Let it go, move forward, and watch blessings flow forward

Angelia Vernon Menchan said...

LaDena,
it seems simple doesnt it, but I know for sure that blood and love will keep one tethered to people who hurt or demean them...

Blessings...
angelia

~Angela said...

Angelia, As usual your post is on point. Everyone will experience periods of brokenness in their lives. Some of US more than others, but that isn't an excuse to walk to the beat of defeat. We have victory in Jesus. HE can & will make our brokenness whole. The world shouldn't know every time were going through a valley, because it doesn't have the power to help us reach the mountain top.

Folake Taylor, MD. said...

So true! I just got rid of that one person who always delighted in taking me back to dark moments in my life and I was so slow it took me fifteen years to get rid of her!!!

Angelia Vernon Menchan said...

Sister we all have them we just have to know when to say, enough!``````

Unknown said...

Angelia, Just last week I had to tell someone close to me that I was not interested in going back. The past is gone and I am looking forward, the fact that she had a need to seek forgiveness from me was fine but I did not want to relive the past. I had dealth with it and has moved on.
I forgave her, but I will not allow her to drag me down.
Like you say I will love her from afar...I will not have an eternal pity party, I love being my wholesome self.

Angelia Vernon Menchan said...

Threading,
I am sooooooooooooo with that...

angelia