I was thinking about a friend this morning, one I hadn’t seen in a while,
And I remember one of our own going conversations,
And that was the one about people getting it together,
She had been in various struggles for most of her life,
And she held out hope that one day it would be better,
Though she continually made the same choices,
With the same results, over and over again…
Whenever we talked about some young person, she would always argue the point,
That any day now that person would change, be better, do better, live better…
One day she became incensed with me because I said,
That some people never do better,
They could, but they just don’t,
I was stunned by her fury, but driving home later that day,
I knew why,
Because if she could believe that others would miraculously change,
Then there was still hope for her…
Because to accept the fact,
That there are truly those amongst us who will always struggle,
Calls for introspection and self-evaluation and that is hard…
So hard,
Yesterday I was talking to a young person in my life,
Who is not all that young any longer,
And I could literally smell inertia,
It was painful to see that it would literally take a miracle for this,
Very gifted and talented person to get it together,
To be all they could be, so to speak,
Because way too much time was spent,
On excuse making,
Wastefulness,
Living in the moment with no eye on the future,
And plain old garden variety fear….
The great soul-killer,
Fear,
And in this case,
I am almost sure it is the fear of success,
Because when one succeeds, does well,
Handles one’s business,
It means one is an adult,
Grown,
Responsible for one’s self,
And for a lot of people that is too much work,
It is easier to go along to get along,
Get by rather than get over,
That’s too bad,
JUST RAMBLING….
LOVE PEACE BLESSINGS!
Angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Friday, April 24, 2009
Bouncing Back...
I am feeling a bit better today,
For the past three days I have been inside nursing the flu,
And seasonal allergies...feeling pretty yucky...
This morning I got up, looked in the mirror and thought,
Ouch,
It is time to cut off some of this hair,
Get a bit of pampering done,
Follow my own advice,
Try to look as good as you can, even when you feel, well, yucky...
See how articulate I am,
Anyway...
I have actually been tired and listless for weeks,
I worked so hard last year,
And was holding myself so tight,
Just trying to get it all done,
That this year as my workload has decreased exponentially,
It has finally hit me,
And there is also the 'changing' female factor,
Whew...somedays it is hot...
You know...
But today, I am determined to move something,
I am going to go outside and put a few flowers in the ground,
Then I am going to spruce up a bit,
And hit the road for some pampering,
Get a complete overhaul,
Maybe purchase a few of those new maxi dresses,
And some fire engine red lip-gloss...
Wow,
I am feeling better already...
LOVE PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
angelia
Is NO Not Clear Enough For You.....SCHAE'S STORY: A Woman's Transformation...and RAMBLINGS: A Booked Blog...ALL THREE FOR 25.00 @
www.angeliavmenchan.com
For the past three days I have been inside nursing the flu,
And seasonal allergies...feeling pretty yucky...
This morning I got up, looked in the mirror and thought,
Ouch,
It is time to cut off some of this hair,
Get a bit of pampering done,
Follow my own advice,
Try to look as good as you can, even when you feel, well, yucky...
See how articulate I am,
Anyway...
I have actually been tired and listless for weeks,
I worked so hard last year,
And was holding myself so tight,
Just trying to get it all done,
That this year as my workload has decreased exponentially,
It has finally hit me,
And there is also the 'changing' female factor,
Whew...somedays it is hot...
You know...
But today, I am determined to move something,
I am going to go outside and put a few flowers in the ground,
Then I am going to spruce up a bit,
And hit the road for some pampering,
Get a complete overhaul,
Maybe purchase a few of those new maxi dresses,
And some fire engine red lip-gloss...
Wow,
I am feeling better already...
LOVE PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
angelia
Is NO Not Clear Enough For You.....SCHAE'S STORY: A Woman's Transformation...and RAMBLINGS: A Booked Blog...ALL THREE FOR 25.00 @
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Friday, April 17, 2009
On The Low...
No, not that kind of low...too funny...
Anyway,
One of the truest signs of growing up, being grown, is knowing when to keep one's mouth shut,
SHHHHHHHHHHHH...
I remember when I got married almost thirty one years ago,
I knew that though I was young, I was grown,
I had made a grown woman's decision and I was going to have to handle it accordingly,
That meant that there was just somethings, no matter how hard they were,
I would have to keep to myself,
Only work out with the man I had said, I do to,
And pray about,
Otherwise I stood the risk of having my business all up and out there,
And surely you can't expect someone to keep your business on the low,
If you can't keep it on the low,
I would always cringe when I would hear my sisters run down their men,
With outsiders, wondering if they even realized what that was saying about themselves,
Because hey they was sleeping with him...ya know...
I recall when I was living in Germany,
There was this technician that worked with me,
He had a reputation of being a bit of a philanderer,
And he was married,
One day his wife was talking about him and telling all the people he would listen about him,
I didn't say a word...
She asked me why I was so quiet,
I told her, that that was too much family stuff to share,
And unless she was planning to leave him....umm hmm,
She never told me anything else, Thank God...
The same holds true for family members,
Keep Them Out Of Your Business,
Because all you are doing is making them form opinions,
Maybe bad ones about someone that you probably plan to be with,
And consider this, maybe they have problems of their own and don't want to be all up in yours,
I am not positively sure on this,
But am pretty close to sure,
What I am sure about is that as hard as it is and as quiet as it's kept,
Somethings really do need to stay on the low...Fo Sho...
HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND...
angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Anyway,
One of the truest signs of growing up, being grown, is knowing when to keep one's mouth shut,
SHHHHHHHHHHHH...
I remember when I got married almost thirty one years ago,
I knew that though I was young, I was grown,
I had made a grown woman's decision and I was going to have to handle it accordingly,
That meant that there was just somethings, no matter how hard they were,
I would have to keep to myself,
Only work out with the man I had said, I do to,
And pray about,
Otherwise I stood the risk of having my business all up and out there,
And surely you can't expect someone to keep your business on the low,
If you can't keep it on the low,
I would always cringe when I would hear my sisters run down their men,
With outsiders, wondering if they even realized what that was saying about themselves,
Because hey they was sleeping with him...ya know...
I recall when I was living in Germany,
There was this technician that worked with me,
He had a reputation of being a bit of a philanderer,
And he was married,
One day his wife was talking about him and telling all the people he would listen about him,
I didn't say a word...
She asked me why I was so quiet,
I told her, that that was too much family stuff to share,
And unless she was planning to leave him....umm hmm,
She never told me anything else, Thank God...
The same holds true for family members,
Keep Them Out Of Your Business,
Because all you are doing is making them form opinions,
Maybe bad ones about someone that you probably plan to be with,
And consider this, maybe they have problems of their own and don't want to be all up in yours,
I am not positively sure on this,
But am pretty close to sure,
What I am sure about is that as hard as it is and as quiet as it's kept,
Somethings really do need to stay on the low...Fo Sho...
HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND...
angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Thursday, April 16, 2009
WHO YOU LOOKING AT?
Considering I am a woman of five decades, give or take, most of my friends are in that same range,
I am fascinated when I talk to them, almost always the desirability factor comes up,
Which translates to do men still find us, them…attractive,
A couple of years ago, I read a poll, I think it was in O magazine about the age that women feel men stop checking them out…
I think it was before forty for Caucasian women,
Somewhere near fifty for Asian and Hispanic women,
And Black women felt that the brothers were checking them out until at least their sixties…
I found that so interesting, because I was wondering what the criteria was,
And I was also wondering who walked around looking at the opposite sex,
To see if the opposite sex was looking at them…
I guess a lot of people…
Anyway, I started doing my own unofficial poll,
And I discovered that this was tied mostly to how women felt about themselves,
Where they were in their lives,
If they were in relationships or not and a lot of other factors,
When conversing with a Caucasian woman who was in her mid-forties,
She confirmed that it bothered her that men didn’t really pay her much attention any longer,
Curious, I asked her how did she know,
She painted a scenario of how for years if she were sitting in an airport,
Or some like place men would usually find a way to say something to her,
And once she hit forty it was as though she wore a sign and the conversations stopped,
Next up was a Hispanic woman of fifty,
She thought the whole thing was silly, and said she felt desirable and that was good enough for her…go mam…
Finally, in talking to a Black woman of about sixty, she laughed in my face, telling me that her focus at this point was on looking good for herself and that she was grateful not to feel like she was on parade…
So I thought about myself,
And I realized that I had never really given a great deal of weight to,
Who was watching or what they were thinking,
And certainly not if they were finding me desirable,
My goodness what a lot of work that must be,
And so difficult to deal with once it all goes away,
And it does go away,
That is why I always try to tell young women to focus on developing whole selves,
Because cute can evaporate like so much water after the rain,
But smarts,
Kindness,
Compassion,
Self-respect,
And respect for other is truly lasting and oh so lovely.
LOVE PEACE BLESSINGS!
Angelia
PURCHASE SCHAE’S STORY: A Woman’s Transformation @
www.angeliavmenchan.com
I am fascinated when I talk to them, almost always the desirability factor comes up,
Which translates to do men still find us, them…attractive,
A couple of years ago, I read a poll, I think it was in O magazine about the age that women feel men stop checking them out…
I think it was before forty for Caucasian women,
Somewhere near fifty for Asian and Hispanic women,
And Black women felt that the brothers were checking them out until at least their sixties…
I found that so interesting, because I was wondering what the criteria was,
And I was also wondering who walked around looking at the opposite sex,
To see if the opposite sex was looking at them…
I guess a lot of people…
Anyway, I started doing my own unofficial poll,
And I discovered that this was tied mostly to how women felt about themselves,
Where they were in their lives,
If they were in relationships or not and a lot of other factors,
When conversing with a Caucasian woman who was in her mid-forties,
She confirmed that it bothered her that men didn’t really pay her much attention any longer,
Curious, I asked her how did she know,
She painted a scenario of how for years if she were sitting in an airport,
Or some like place men would usually find a way to say something to her,
And once she hit forty it was as though she wore a sign and the conversations stopped,
Next up was a Hispanic woman of fifty,
She thought the whole thing was silly, and said she felt desirable and that was good enough for her…go mam…
Finally, in talking to a Black woman of about sixty, she laughed in my face, telling me that her focus at this point was on looking good for herself and that she was grateful not to feel like she was on parade…
So I thought about myself,
And I realized that I had never really given a great deal of weight to,
Who was watching or what they were thinking,
And certainly not if they were finding me desirable,
My goodness what a lot of work that must be,
And so difficult to deal with once it all goes away,
And it does go away,
That is why I always try to tell young women to focus on developing whole selves,
Because cute can evaporate like so much water after the rain,
But smarts,
Kindness,
Compassion,
Self-respect,
And respect for other is truly lasting and oh so lovely.
LOVE PEACE BLESSINGS!
Angelia
PURCHASE SCHAE’S STORY: A Woman’s Transformation @
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Don't Spread it Around...
I love clear, concise messages,
Nothing veiled, no innuendo, just tell me and allow me to respond,
It is always so funny to me when I hear someone talk about the infamous,
“They”
They said this or they said that,
I always ask who are they?
The other thing that grinds on my nerve is group discipline,
My grandmother was a huge proponent of this,
I adored my grandma,
But found it so unfair that if one cousin committed an act,
All of us were punished for it,
Shoot, where was the justice in that?
It simply meant that,
So and so could act up all they wanted and then watch us all get punished for it,
That is just wrong,
That is why I don’t like emails or memorandums that go out to the masses,
Telling them to correct this or correct that,
And if they don’t, such and such will happen,
Why not just call the person into the office,
Tell them what the offenses are, act accordingly and move forward,
Because what often happens is the culprits don’t respond well to this kind of thing,
Otherwise these messages wouldn’t have to be sent out over and over,
It seems that violators always assume the message is for someone else,
And the behaviors continue,
When managing I find it unfair to chastise people who have done nothing wrong,
And that it creates an environment of suspicion and gossip,
Also, when you confront a person head on, there is no question who it was meant for,
Seems simple to me and leaves no question in anyone’s mind…
And it contributes to a healthy work environment…
Blessings!
angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Nothing veiled, no innuendo, just tell me and allow me to respond,
It is always so funny to me when I hear someone talk about the infamous,
“They”
They said this or they said that,
I always ask who are they?
The other thing that grinds on my nerve is group discipline,
My grandmother was a huge proponent of this,
I adored my grandma,
But found it so unfair that if one cousin committed an act,
All of us were punished for it,
Shoot, where was the justice in that?
It simply meant that,
So and so could act up all they wanted and then watch us all get punished for it,
That is just wrong,
That is why I don’t like emails or memorandums that go out to the masses,
Telling them to correct this or correct that,
And if they don’t, such and such will happen,
Why not just call the person into the office,
Tell them what the offenses are, act accordingly and move forward,
Because what often happens is the culprits don’t respond well to this kind of thing,
Otherwise these messages wouldn’t have to be sent out over and over,
It seems that violators always assume the message is for someone else,
And the behaviors continue,
When managing I find it unfair to chastise people who have done nothing wrong,
And that it creates an environment of suspicion and gossip,
Also, when you confront a person head on, there is no question who it was meant for,
Seems simple to me and leaves no question in anyone’s mind…
And it contributes to a healthy work environment…
Blessings!
angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
BODY KNOWLEDGE...
The other day I was talking to a girlfriend and she was bemoaning the fact that she had gained about fifteen pounds. She told me she was going to get new clothes. I kept quiet, I am like a man when it comes to that, don’t know what to say, so say nothing. I have to be really close to someone to even go there. Noticing my quiet, she asked how was that in the ten years she had known me I had stayed the same size. I told her that I know my body. She looked at me and I explained to her;
My body tells me when it is time to do something, when I am eating too much, or not moving enough, I feel tired and sluggish, so I change what I eat and move a bit more.
That is exactly what happened recently, I started off the new year eating really well, then about late February I started eating junky. Caramel macchiatos and cake at breakfast, chicken tenders at lunch, I would eat lots of fruit and veggies, but the other stuff too. I didn’t feel good. I knew I had gained some weight, even though I was still fitting my clothes. On Friday the doctor confirmed it, I had gained eight pounds. Immediately I knew it was time to handle it. Back to non-fat yogurt and cheerios for breakfast, a bowl of vegetables with olive oil for lunch and a light dinner. Because what I know for sure is that ignoring the signs lead to places I don’t want to go, I know my body and I listen to it. When I am tired, I rest, when I gain weight, I cut back and when something ails me I go to the doctor.
I recall years ago working with a woman who hadn’t had a pap in over twenty years, I was horrified when she told me, because this woman had health insurance. I asked why. She told me that when she had her youngest child, she just never went again. As life would have it, she was now going because something had gone awry. She ended up having surgery that probably could have been prevented if only she had kept her annual appointments. A couple of years ago, my doctor told me that it was decided that if a woman had several normal paps, she could go up to three years without one. I told him no thank you very much. Though, there are few things that I enjoy less than putting my feet in those stirrups, I will do it every year because knowledge is power and body knowledge is life-saving. PLEASE HAVE YOUR PAP, MAMMOGRAMS AND ANNUAL CHECKUPS, THE LIFE YOU SAVE MIGHT BE YOUR OWN.
LOVE PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
Angelia
Support Cancer Research @
www.angeliavmenchan.com
My body tells me when it is time to do something, when I am eating too much, or not moving enough, I feel tired and sluggish, so I change what I eat and move a bit more.
That is exactly what happened recently, I started off the new year eating really well, then about late February I started eating junky. Caramel macchiatos and cake at breakfast, chicken tenders at lunch, I would eat lots of fruit and veggies, but the other stuff too. I didn’t feel good. I knew I had gained some weight, even though I was still fitting my clothes. On Friday the doctor confirmed it, I had gained eight pounds. Immediately I knew it was time to handle it. Back to non-fat yogurt and cheerios for breakfast, a bowl of vegetables with olive oil for lunch and a light dinner. Because what I know for sure is that ignoring the signs lead to places I don’t want to go, I know my body and I listen to it. When I am tired, I rest, when I gain weight, I cut back and when something ails me I go to the doctor.
I recall years ago working with a woman who hadn’t had a pap in over twenty years, I was horrified when she told me, because this woman had health insurance. I asked why. She told me that when she had her youngest child, she just never went again. As life would have it, she was now going because something had gone awry. She ended up having surgery that probably could have been prevented if only she had kept her annual appointments. A couple of years ago, my doctor told me that it was decided that if a woman had several normal paps, she could go up to three years without one. I told him no thank you very much. Though, there are few things that I enjoy less than putting my feet in those stirrups, I will do it every year because knowledge is power and body knowledge is life-saving. PLEASE HAVE YOUR PAP, MAMMOGRAMS AND ANNUAL CHECKUPS, THE LIFE YOU SAVE MIGHT BE YOUR OWN.
LOVE PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
Angelia
Support Cancer Research @
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Monday, April 13, 2009
POINTS OF PRIDE...
I am always fascinated by what people are proud of,
Mostly it amuses me, sometimes it flabbergasts me,
One of them is when I hear a woman say I can get any man I want,
I always want to say, ‘Get him to do what?’
Almost any woman with feminine parts can get a man,For real,
But get him to be faithful, marry you, take care the babies…what?
Cause if you got it going on like that, please share it with the masses who haven’t figured it out, I am so sure they will be grateful,
Okay, moving on,
Another rule of fascination are people who proudly say,
‘I don’t watch television…’
They are a superior lot,
They say at is if watching television is akin to selling one’s wares on street corners,
There are many wonderful shows on television, including the news,
I always giggle when people come in soaking wet because in they missed the weather report,
Too funny…
And the final one for today are those who say,
‘I don’t read…’
There are actually people who write books who say this,
I am always really amazed by this,
Because I want to ask, ‘How do you know things?’
What do you talk about?
How do you encourage the kiddies to learn?
The best way to learn about the world,
In my limited opinion is by the written word,
We can learn what is going on around us and abroad by reading the newspaper,
Or about current events by checking out a weekly magazine,
Or better prepare ourselves educationally or for employment,
By reading books and or papers,
And we can certainly escape from the everydayness of everyday,
By reading something fun, or entertaining…
But maybe I simply haven’t a clue…
What do you think?
LOVE PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
Angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Mostly it amuses me, sometimes it flabbergasts me,
One of them is when I hear a woman say I can get any man I want,
I always want to say, ‘Get him to do what?’
Almost any woman with feminine parts can get a man,For real,
But get him to be faithful, marry you, take care the babies…what?
Cause if you got it going on like that, please share it with the masses who haven’t figured it out, I am so sure they will be grateful,
Okay, moving on,
Another rule of fascination are people who proudly say,
‘I don’t watch television…’
They are a superior lot,
They say at is if watching television is akin to selling one’s wares on street corners,
There are many wonderful shows on television, including the news,
I always giggle when people come in soaking wet because in they missed the weather report,
Too funny…
And the final one for today are those who say,
‘I don’t read…’
There are actually people who write books who say this,
I am always really amazed by this,
Because I want to ask, ‘How do you know things?’
What do you talk about?
How do you encourage the kiddies to learn?
The best way to learn about the world,
In my limited opinion is by the written word,
We can learn what is going on around us and abroad by reading the newspaper,
Or about current events by checking out a weekly magazine,
Or better prepare ourselves educationally or for employment,
By reading books and or papers,
And we can certainly escape from the everydayness of everyday,
By reading something fun, or entertaining…
But maybe I simply haven’t a clue…
What do you think?
LOVE PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
Angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
POINTS OF PRIDE...
I am always fascinated by what people are proud of,
Mostly it amuses me, sometimes it flabbergasts me,
One of them is when I hear a woman say I can get any man I want,
I always want to say, ‘Get him to do what?’
Almost any woman with feminine parts can get a man,For real,
But get him to be faithful, marry you, take care the babies…what?
Cause if you got it going on like that, please share it with the masses who haven’t figured it out, I am so sure they will be grateful,
Okay, moving on,
Another rule of fascination are people who proudly say,
‘I don’t watch television…’
They are a superior lot,
They say at is if watching television is akin to selling one’s wares on street corners,
There are many wonderful shows on television, including the news,
I always giggle when people come in soaking wet because in they missed the weather report,
Too funny…
And the final one for today are those who say,
‘I don’t read…’
There are actually people who write books who say this,
I am always really amazed by this,
Because I want to ask, ‘How do you know things?’
What do you talk about?
How do you encourage the kiddies to learn?
The best way to learn about the world,
In my limited opinion is by the written word,
We can learn what is going on around us and abroad by reading the newspaper,
Or about current events by checking out a weekly magazine,
Or better prepare ourselves educationally or for employment,
By reading books and or papers,
And we can certainly escape from the everydayness of everyday,
By reading something fun, or entertaining…
But maybe I simply haven’t a clue…
What do you think?
LOVE PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
Angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Mostly it amuses me, sometimes it flabbergasts me,
One of them is when I hear a woman say I can get any man I want,
I always want to say, ‘Get him to do what?’
Almost any woman with feminine parts can get a man,For real,
But get him to be faithful, marry you, take care the babies…what?
Cause if you got it going on like that, please share it with the masses who haven’t figured it out, I am so sure they will be grateful,
Okay, moving on,
Another rule of fascination are people who proudly say,
‘I don’t watch television…’
They are a superior lot,
They say at is if watching television is akin to selling one’s wares on street corners,
There are many wonderful shows on television, including the news,
I always giggle when people come in soaking wet because in they missed the weather report,
Too funny…
And the final one for today are those who say,
‘I don’t read…’
There are actually people who write books who say this,
I am always really amazed by this,
Because I want to ask, ‘How do you know things?’
What do you talk about?
How do you encourage the kiddies to learn?
The best way to learn about the world,
In my limited opinion is by the written word,
We can learn what is going on around us and abroad by reading the newspaper,
Or about current events by checking out a weekly magazine,
Or better prepare ourselves educationally or for employment,
By reading books and or papers,
And we can certainly escape from the everydayness of everyday,
By reading something fun, or entertaining…
But maybe I simply haven’t a clue…
What do you think?
LOVE PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
Angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Long Weekends...
For the past few weeks I have been energy-less,
When I got back from visiting my kids, I was like a house on fire,
Painting, redecorating, moving and shaking,
But now I am just tired, needed to rejuventate...
So I am on a four day weekend,
My plan today is to pitter around the house, read a bit,
I am thinking about getting a haircut,
And maybe buy myself a new dress,
But beyond that, major chilling,
Tomorrow is Good Friday,
And I have my physical,
I think it is a good day for that,
Today I am on a twenty-four hour fast,
That should help a bit,
Then this weekend my man and I are going to hit the road,
Visit our peeps,
See what is up down south a bit,
I also plan to read two or three books,
I started reading, The Long Fall by Walter Mosley last night,
So far, so good...
Next up is Life is Short but Wide by J California Cooper,
After that who knows...I am just chilling...
WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON THIS EASTER WEEKEND?
Love Peace BLESSINGS...
angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
When I got back from visiting my kids, I was like a house on fire,
Painting, redecorating, moving and shaking,
But now I am just tired, needed to rejuventate...
So I am on a four day weekend,
My plan today is to pitter around the house, read a bit,
I am thinking about getting a haircut,
And maybe buy myself a new dress,
But beyond that, major chilling,
Tomorrow is Good Friday,
And I have my physical,
I think it is a good day for that,
Today I am on a twenty-four hour fast,
That should help a bit,
Then this weekend my man and I are going to hit the road,
Visit our peeps,
See what is up down south a bit,
I also plan to read two or three books,
I started reading, The Long Fall by Walter Mosley last night,
So far, so good...
Next up is Life is Short but Wide by J California Cooper,
After that who knows...I am just chilling...
WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON THIS EASTER WEEKEND?
Love Peace BLESSINGS...
angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
What Is That All About?
Sometimes I simply have to ask, ‘What is that all about?’
I’m sure that many of you have read many blogs and articles about getting,
Non-black folks to read books by black folks,
It seems to be there is no ‘relatibility’,
Which puzzles the heck out of me…
Because people are people, aren’t they,
A couple months ago, I was sitting in the airport with quite a layover,
And was reading, ‘Twilight by Stephanie Meyer’…the mega-selling book about vampires,
I hadn’t intended to read it, but my daughter in law had read it and sang it’s praises,
So I purchased it and was reading it,
I found it entertaining, and it got me through a long wait,
So I was glad it had been suggested,
A woman asked me about it,
I told her it was good, I noted she was reading, ‘The Reader’,
We discussed it a bit, and then I began to wonder,
Would she have asked about my book if the book had been by say,
‘Eric Jerome Dickey’…why that occurred to me I can’t say,
But I do know that not once in my rather extensive travel and reading life,
Had a non-black person asked me about a book I was reading if the book was obviously by black folks, ie, black person on the cover,
That was a revelation,
And I then started to wonder about what needed to be relatable,
I mean come on, a gazillion people read about vampires and wizards,
And surely most people have more in common with other folks, regardless of the hue of their skin, than with vampires and wizards, don’t they?
Hmmm…
What is that all about?
Sometimes I wonder is it that people think they already know all there is to know about black folks…
Or do they think black books have nothing to offer beyond the drama and hood life,
And where would they come up with that notion, if they had never read the book?
I always remember the first time one of my co-workers read one of my books,
And they said, it was the first time they had thought of me as black…I wasn’t sure what that meant, so I asked for an explanation,
They told me that they just thought of me as being another person,
Okay, then why can’t they think of a book by a black author as just another book?
LOVE PEACE BLESSINGS!
angelia
WWW.ANGELIAVMENCHAN.COM
I’m sure that many of you have read many blogs and articles about getting,
Non-black folks to read books by black folks,
It seems to be there is no ‘relatibility’,
Which puzzles the heck out of me…
Because people are people, aren’t they,
A couple months ago, I was sitting in the airport with quite a layover,
And was reading, ‘Twilight by Stephanie Meyer’…the mega-selling book about vampires,
I hadn’t intended to read it, but my daughter in law had read it and sang it’s praises,
So I purchased it and was reading it,
I found it entertaining, and it got me through a long wait,
So I was glad it had been suggested,
A woman asked me about it,
I told her it was good, I noted she was reading, ‘The Reader’,
We discussed it a bit, and then I began to wonder,
Would she have asked about my book if the book had been by say,
‘Eric Jerome Dickey’…why that occurred to me I can’t say,
But I do know that not once in my rather extensive travel and reading life,
Had a non-black person asked me about a book I was reading if the book was obviously by black folks, ie, black person on the cover,
That was a revelation,
And I then started to wonder about what needed to be relatable,
I mean come on, a gazillion people read about vampires and wizards,
And surely most people have more in common with other folks, regardless of the hue of their skin, than with vampires and wizards, don’t they?
Hmmm…
What is that all about?
Sometimes I wonder is it that people think they already know all there is to know about black folks…
Or do they think black books have nothing to offer beyond the drama and hood life,
And where would they come up with that notion, if they had never read the book?
I always remember the first time one of my co-workers read one of my books,
And they said, it was the first time they had thought of me as black…I wasn’t sure what that meant, so I asked for an explanation,
They told me that they just thought of me as being another person,
Okay, then why can’t they think of a book by a black author as just another book?
LOVE PEACE BLESSINGS!
angelia
WWW.ANGELIAVMENCHAN.COM
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
You Gotta Respect That!
One thing I respect is the truth,
Even when the truth is something I don't necessarily want to hear, I appreciate it,
This morning I was floating around cyberspace and I saw someone's response to someone else,
Continually sending them information about their book...
I am paraphrasing here but it went something like this;
'You have sent me this info several times and if anything having you continually send it will probably cause me not to buy your book...' Enuf said...I smiled because it had been addressed directly to the person and was on point and kindly stated...
I learned that lesson a long time ago...
I had joined this group, was an active participant, but periodically, myself and others would send out book blurbs, etc...
One woman, ineloquently said,
"I am not interested in your books, if I were I would simply read it at the bottom of your email..."
I took that to heart, another writer asked me if I were offended and I told her absolutely not,
I told her I appreciated the honesty and would remember the advice...because I know for myself that bombarding me with something doesn't make me purchase anything...so why should I expect different from anyone else...
And I love it when people just say it,
A couple of years ago when I started blogging,
Someone posted a huge advertisement on my blog,
They didn't comment or anything, simply advertised,
I sent them an email, telling them I was going to delete it,
Because while I didn't mind a bit of information at a minimum a response to the post,
Would have been a bit more subtle...
They thanked me and told me they respected the fact that I told them why I deleted it,
Obviously, they had been getting deleted all over the place...
I told him that I try to treat folks as I would have them treat me,
I want to be told if I break an unwritten rule,
Or color outside the lines,
Just tell me and you have my word,
It won't happen again...
LOVE PEACE BLESSINGS!
angelia
Is NO Not Clear Enough For You
SCHAE'S STORY: A Woman's Transformation
RAMBLINGS: A Booked Blog Volume I @
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Even when the truth is something I don't necessarily want to hear, I appreciate it,
This morning I was floating around cyberspace and I saw someone's response to someone else,
Continually sending them information about their book...
I am paraphrasing here but it went something like this;
'You have sent me this info several times and if anything having you continually send it will probably cause me not to buy your book...' Enuf said...I smiled because it had been addressed directly to the person and was on point and kindly stated...
I learned that lesson a long time ago...
I had joined this group, was an active participant, but periodically, myself and others would send out book blurbs, etc...
One woman, ineloquently said,
"I am not interested in your books, if I were I would simply read it at the bottom of your email..."
I took that to heart, another writer asked me if I were offended and I told her absolutely not,
I told her I appreciated the honesty and would remember the advice...because I know for myself that bombarding me with something doesn't make me purchase anything...so why should I expect different from anyone else...
And I love it when people just say it,
A couple of years ago when I started blogging,
Someone posted a huge advertisement on my blog,
They didn't comment or anything, simply advertised,
I sent them an email, telling them I was going to delete it,
Because while I didn't mind a bit of information at a minimum a response to the post,
Would have been a bit more subtle...
They thanked me and told me they respected the fact that I told them why I deleted it,
Obviously, they had been getting deleted all over the place...
I told him that I try to treat folks as I would have them treat me,
I want to be told if I break an unwritten rule,
Or color outside the lines,
Just tell me and you have my word,
It won't happen again...
LOVE PEACE BLESSINGS!
angelia
Is NO Not Clear Enough For You
SCHAE'S STORY: A Woman's Transformation
RAMBLINGS: A Booked Blog Volume I @
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Monday, April 6, 2009
APOOO 2ND QTR READING CHALLENGE
Where Did You Sleep Last Night by Danzy Senna - Completed 4 Stars
Sag Harbor by Colson Whitehead - Completed 4 Stars
Life is Short but Wide - J California Cooper
The Long Fall - Walter Mosely
A Fortunate Age by Joann Rakoff
Sisters and Husbands by Connie Briscoe
The Shack by Wm Young
Keep the Faith by Faith Evans
Maynard and Jennica
Fledging by Octavia Butler
Finding Joy in Pain by Roslyn Wyche-Hamilton
Up Pops The Devil by Angela Benson
Sinful Too by Victor McGlothin
angelia
SUPPORT BREAST CANCER RESEARCH @
WWW.ANGELIAVMENCHAN.COM
Sag Harbor by Colson Whitehead - Completed 4 Stars
Life is Short but Wide - J California Cooper
The Long Fall - Walter Mosely
A Fortunate Age by Joann Rakoff
Sisters and Husbands by Connie Briscoe
The Shack by Wm Young
Keep the Faith by Faith Evans
Maynard and Jennica
Fledging by Octavia Butler
Finding Joy in Pain by Roslyn Wyche-Hamilton
Up Pops The Devil by Angela Benson
Sinful Too by Victor McGlothin
angelia
SUPPORT BREAST CANCER RESEARCH @
WWW.ANGELIAVMENCHAN.COM
Friday, April 3, 2009
Memoirs...
I am currently reading Where Did You Sleep Last Night by Danzy Senna,
It is a memoir of sorts, she is writing about her parents and history and her personal identity,
Her father was an African American with a promising future, but had addictions that stood in the way of his success...
Her mother a Caucasian woman who could trace her ancestry to the Mayflower...
And it is noted that their divorce was one of the ugliest in Boston's history...ouch...
I had read a previous work by Ms. Senna, Caucasia and enjoyed it and I am enjoying her current work...however, I am always curious about what gave an author the courage to write about his or her life in such a way...more curious about how it impacts those who are being written about...whether they consented or if they liked how they were portrayed, etc.
I have often thought of writing about certain parts of my life,
And if I were to write it, I would do it as honestly as possible,
And I know that many would be flattered,
And some would be straight up pissed off and would probably never speak to me again,
As such I have not done it,
In fact even in these blogs, I go out of my way to protect the guilty...so to speak, there are people I never mention,
Anyway...
Though I am not done with the book, I can only wonder how Danzy's father will feel about what she has written...
So do you like memoirs and if you are a writer would you ever write one?
And if you did, how honest would you be?
HAPPY FRIDAY! LOVE, PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
It is a memoir of sorts, she is writing about her parents and history and her personal identity,
Her father was an African American with a promising future, but had addictions that stood in the way of his success...
Her mother a Caucasian woman who could trace her ancestry to the Mayflower...
And it is noted that their divorce was one of the ugliest in Boston's history...ouch...
I had read a previous work by Ms. Senna, Caucasia and enjoyed it and I am enjoying her current work...however, I am always curious about what gave an author the courage to write about his or her life in such a way...more curious about how it impacts those who are being written about...whether they consented or if they liked how they were portrayed, etc.
I have often thought of writing about certain parts of my life,
And if I were to write it, I would do it as honestly as possible,
And I know that many would be flattered,
And some would be straight up pissed off and would probably never speak to me again,
As such I have not done it,
In fact even in these blogs, I go out of my way to protect the guilty...so to speak, there are people I never mention,
Anyway...
Though I am not done with the book, I can only wonder how Danzy's father will feel about what she has written...
So do you like memoirs and if you are a writer would you ever write one?
And if you did, how honest would you be?
HAPPY FRIDAY! LOVE, PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
angelia
www.angeliavmenchan.com
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Hiding in Plain Sight...
The other day I was conversing with a woman and somehow the conversation moved to looks and makeup,
She asked me if I had ever worn a lot of it,
I told her, ‘No, not really, I love lipstick and lipgloss and I powder because I have a shiny nose but that is about it,’
I asked her why, and tears appeared in her eyes,
‘Because people don’t recognize me without makeup…’
I knew better than to say anything,
So she reiterated to me this painful experience she’d had,
She told me that one day she woke up and realized she didn’t have any coffee,
So she ran down the corner grocery to get some,
She was wearing a bright orange sweat suit…
She saw her neighbor, who looked right through her without a bit of recognition,
So she said nothing, however, later that day she ran into the neighbor again,
This time she had on makeup, but the same clothing,
The neighbor asked if she had been at the grocer’s that morning,
She nodded yes and the neighbor said;
‘Oh my god, you look so different without makeup, I didn’t even recognize you, if it weren’t for that day-glow outfit I wouldn’t have known it was you!’
She said her feelings were so hurt and that she would never go out without makeup again…
I felt her pain,
But didn’t really understand,
That felt like hiding in plain sight to me,
I was raised by women who loved to look good,
But looking good for them rarely had anything to do with covering up,
It was mostly how they carried themselves and their personal style...
Most of them had to really be dressed to kill to even have on lipstick,
They all had remarkable skin,
And beautifully arched eyebrows,
But not a bit of coverage,
And they pretty much raised us the same way,
To look as good as we wanted to, but to allow the world to see us,
As we were,
So that no one would ever be shocked or stunned when they truly saw us…
LOVE PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
angelia
She asked me if I had ever worn a lot of it,
I told her, ‘No, not really, I love lipstick and lipgloss and I powder because I have a shiny nose but that is about it,’
I asked her why, and tears appeared in her eyes,
‘Because people don’t recognize me without makeup…’
I knew better than to say anything,
So she reiterated to me this painful experience she’d had,
She told me that one day she woke up and realized she didn’t have any coffee,
So she ran down the corner grocery to get some,
She was wearing a bright orange sweat suit…
She saw her neighbor, who looked right through her without a bit of recognition,
So she said nothing, however, later that day she ran into the neighbor again,
This time she had on makeup, but the same clothing,
The neighbor asked if she had been at the grocer’s that morning,
She nodded yes and the neighbor said;
‘Oh my god, you look so different without makeup, I didn’t even recognize you, if it weren’t for that day-glow outfit I wouldn’t have known it was you!’
She said her feelings were so hurt and that she would never go out without makeup again…
I felt her pain,
But didn’t really understand,
That felt like hiding in plain sight to me,
I was raised by women who loved to look good,
But looking good for them rarely had anything to do with covering up,
It was mostly how they carried themselves and their personal style...
Most of them had to really be dressed to kill to even have on lipstick,
They all had remarkable skin,
And beautifully arched eyebrows,
But not a bit of coverage,
And they pretty much raised us the same way,
To look as good as we wanted to, but to allow the world to see us,
As we were,
So that no one would ever be shocked or stunned when they truly saw us…
LOVE PEACE AND BLESSINGS!
angelia
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
FEELINGS ARE AGELESS...
I am always amazed and amused when young people talk as though they have a monopoly on feelings…it seems that many think that after 40 something, feeling.. take a back seat to everything else,
Well let me disabuse the babies of that notion,
Feelings are ageless,
I remember when writing my first book,
My niece, yeah K, I am talking about you,
Was concerned that my main characters were aging,
She wanted them to stay young, it seems she wanted to know,
What they could be up to as they aged,
After laughing a bit, I told her to hold on,
Before I could deal with that, someone offered me a book deal,
However, I was told I would have to rewrite my first book,
And make the characters younger,
Because no one wanted to read about people in their forties and fifties being intimate,
I was told that at that age characters should only be about mentoring and caretaking,
I was stunned, didn’t know that the definitions of women was so narrow,
So I said, ‘No thank you very much…’
Because what I know for sure is that we can mentor and feel,
Bodies age, feelings don’t,
And people still want to love, be cared for, have relationships and intimacy at all ages,
And truth be told, they are probably better at it,
Because so much stuff has been experienced and hopefully resolved as we get older,
We aren’t as caught up as we were when we were younger,
But maybe I am wrong,
But you know what I plan to stay wrong and continue to,
Feel something and write about those who do the same!
SCHAE’S STORY: A Woman’s Transformation
Ageless Fiction @ http://www.angeliavmenchan.com/
LOVE PEACE BLESSINGS!
angelia
Well let me disabuse the babies of that notion,
Feelings are ageless,
I remember when writing my first book,
My niece, yeah K, I am talking about you,
Was concerned that my main characters were aging,
She wanted them to stay young, it seems she wanted to know,
What they could be up to as they aged,
After laughing a bit, I told her to hold on,
Before I could deal with that, someone offered me a book deal,
However, I was told I would have to rewrite my first book,
And make the characters younger,
Because no one wanted to read about people in their forties and fifties being intimate,
I was told that at that age characters should only be about mentoring and caretaking,
I was stunned, didn’t know that the definitions of women was so narrow,
So I said, ‘No thank you very much…’
Because what I know for sure is that we can mentor and feel,
Bodies age, feelings don’t,
And people still want to love, be cared for, have relationships and intimacy at all ages,
And truth be told, they are probably better at it,
Because so much stuff has been experienced and hopefully resolved as we get older,
We aren’t as caught up as we were when we were younger,
But maybe I am wrong,
But you know what I plan to stay wrong and continue to,
Feel something and write about those who do the same!
SCHAE’S STORY: A Woman’s Transformation
Ageless Fiction @ http://www.angeliavmenchan.com/
LOVE PEACE BLESSINGS!
angelia
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